Dancing With The Daffodils
Genre: Contemporary M/M Romance.
Blurb:
Val, an English teacher, takes an exchange position in
Australia to recover from the death of his lover. He stages Romeo and Juliet at
his school, and becomes close friends with Anna, the head teacher. Oliver (who
plays Romeo) falls in love with Val, and although the feeling is mutual,
because of his position Val cannot allow the relationship to develop.
Val struggles with his feelings, unable to come to terms
with Oliver’s youthful seductive ways, and unable to reconcile his heartache
over David’s death with his developing affection for Oliver, which he must
reject both internally and externally. And at the same time he must make a life
for himself in a country far from his friends and the world he knows. How do
you decide between love and duty?
Excerpt:
The frost sparkled on the pavements and the piled snow on the bare
branches mocked me with its whiteness. My breath smoked out its pain as I
waited for Sean. A bitter wind whipped up as I stood there, and it began to
snow again. The morning was freezing. I was freezing, and the warm coat, scarf
and gloves couldn’t penetrate the chill of agony that ate out my insides. I
pulled the coat around me, shivering, and wondered whether I would ever be warm
again. I turned and stared at the house for a last time, then bent and picked
one of the early daffodils, briefly immobilised by the pain of memory as his
laughter echoed across the frosty lawn.
“We’ll have daffodils
next spring!”
And I had helped him up after the bulbs were safely in, and
complained that he stank of fertilizer. I twirled the daffodil between my
fingers and I refused to allow the tears to fall.
Sean was uncharacteristically quiet as he helped load the
suitcases into the boot and we hardly spoke as he drove me to Manchester
airport, but that was his way of showing me that he understood, his way of
allowing me to wallow in my despair. I glanced up and peered into the snow as
he pulled the car over to the side of the road. The flurries whirled outside
the windows, and I strained to see where we were in this neverending world of
whiteness. When I finally realised, the ice immobilised me, froze me to my
seat.
"We’ve got time before the plane leaves," he whispered.
But I couldn’t. I knew I ought to do this - that somehow this
small detour along the journey was expected of me, was something that I should
do. But I couldn’t even bring myself to leave the car. And it didn’t matter
that Sean thought I didn’t care, because there was no way anybody could think
that, and if they did, they had no right to think it. I did care. I felt the
hot prickles of care welling up behind my eyes. But I couldn’t move. It would
have been too final, and however much I needed to leave - and they all said I
should - I couldn’t actually say goodbye.
So we drove on from the cemetery without a last visit to his
grave, and it didn’t tear my heart out because at that point, I remember
thinking, I didn’t really have a heart to be torn. Just ice within my chest
cavity - ice, which would melt into emptiness in the meaningless sunshine of
where I was going - Australia.
“You will email me.”
Sean’s soft words, whispered close to my ear, were heavy with
tears. I held on tightly. He had loved David too, had loved us both, and he had
given me nothing but unwavering support. Even when he could have hurt me with
the truth of my actions he hadn’t. He had recognised that the pain I was giving
myself was enough, that it didn’t take his stating the obvious for me to know
what I had done wrong. And I loved him for that. I held on, my nose buried in
the wool of his coat, unable to let go.
“Of course I will.”
“I need to know how
you really are. Not what you think I want to hear.”
I nodded. I couldn’t say any more. The words were stuck there
somewhere in a lump, and wouldn’t come out. He understood, as he always did.
“Come on, lad. Let’s
get you on this plane.”
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Congrats on the publication of your new novel! I love the title--very intriguing. Best wishes for your success.
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