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Guest Author Today: Erastes
Erastes is the pen name of a bisexual female who lives in Norfolk,
England on
the Norfolk Broads. She started writing in 2003 after
discovering fanfiction
but despite writing fanfic and finding it
invaluable as a "nursery slope" she
wanted to publish her work and
make money--if possible. Her first
novel--Standish, sold in 2004 and
she hasn't looked back. She specialises in
gay historical fiction
although mutters darkly on a regular basis that if she
invented worlds
of the future she wouldn't have to do all this pesky
research. She's a
Lambda award finalist and she's been published by Running
Press and
Carina. Her latest novel is "Junction X" published by Cheyenne
Press
in 2011 and you can find all about the novels, novellas and
short
stories inbetween at her website.
www.erastes.com Find her also on
Twitter
and just about everywhere else.
Can a woman write m/m?
Well of course they can! What they have to
consider though, is that they can’t write gay literature, nor can they write
gay fiction. Or gay porn. Without the necessary *ahem* fruit of the loom as it
were, it’s impossible to visualise or empathise with another gender. I mean, if
we could do that then there’s no end
of the stuff we gals would end up writing. Heavens above. We could be writing
all kinds of nonsense, like dragons and aliens and cops and who knows where it
would end.
But m/m? Certainly! Here’s my top tips on
how to get to the top.
1.
Never forget who you are
writing FOR. This is so vital I can’t stress it enough. You are writing for
straight women, married and single who think of romance constantly and crave it
as much as I crave cheese on toast. Why must you remember this? Because they
want to read about two men having sex (of course, two cocks are much sexier
than one, right?) but they don’t want all the mess associated with it. No hairy
backs sacks and cracks, (in fact see point six for this). No bodily odours
except lovely feminine ones like lavender or better still, chocolate and
strawberries. No *ahem * soiling of cocks and fingers. No no no. No silent
grunting screwed up eye sex. These ladies want ROMANCE and it has to be pretty,
smelling nice, in nice places and clean. Imagine that they want your
protagonists to perform on a lilac scented bed in their living room for their
titillation and they don’t want to have to mop up after them.
2.
Your readers will expect it, so
always, always have two diametrically different protagonists. If one of them is
tall and dark, the other must be short, much shorter, in order to rest his head
on the taller one’s chest when weeping (see weeping, point 4). As to
colouration, the shorter one must be
unique in some way. His hair can be dark, although it’s much better to go
lighter, but if it’s dark it has to be the black of a raven’s wing, or black as
obsidian in tight curls—ringlets are much better, everyone loves ringlets.
Chestnut, auburn, pillar-box red, purple, blond (with coloured tips) all these
are perfectly acceptable colours, as long as the hair is long, shoulder length
at least and waist length for preference.
3.
Their characters must also be
opposite. If one is bold, brash and reckless, the other must be timid (to the
point of catatonia). If one never shows his feelings, this will trample on the
feelings of the weaker male which of course adds that delicious aspect
conflict—lots of weeping! The readers love weeping!
4.
And on to weeping. There can
never be enough. You can have your protagonists crying because they’ve been
abandoned by a lost love (and the new love comes along to console him); or when
he’s been cruelly used by his new love (up to and including dub-con**); he can
weep buckets when he’s hurt (leading nicely to hurt-comfort sex), and of course
there’s happiness when he’s been given a home, a gift, a stepson, a marriage
proposal. Include bodily contact with the happy tears, nothing so wonderfully
sentimental and likely to get your reader’s pulse racing when your omega gets
his alpha’s shirt all damp.
5.
Talking. This is absolutely
vital, and many readers will expect just as much dialogue as sex, in fact
they’ll expect dialogue in the sex because no one likes a silent sex scene.
Your characters must
communicate on just about every level. Every single thing that upsets them or
makes them happy must be shared—unless (see point 2) you are wanting to add in
“boding silence” as conflict which of course works perfectly. There’s nothing
that your readers will like more than a heart-to-heart (preferably in front of
the fire, braiding each other’s hair) just before the final sex scene of the
book, or better still, during it.
6.
Sex must be frequent but note
this well: it must ONLY be between your main protagonists. There’s no room in
m/m for hook-ups, internet casual sex, or any promiscuity at all (unless your
omega is a prostitute saved from himself by the alpha). You can delay the first
sex scene for a chapter or two after they meet but any longer than that and
you’ll start getting TL:DR reviews on Amazon (which of COURSE you must check
daily, if not more frequently for reviews, also Goodreads.) Once the sex begins
of course there is much to remember:
a.
It must always be the Best Sex
That Either Of Them Has Ever Had. No argument here. If your alpha (specially if
he’s been a randy boy before meeting that sweet thing of his dreams) has been
tom-catting it about before the book starts then he’s never, ever going to
stray once he starts having butt-sex
with your omega because it’s got to be That Good.
b.
One sex scene a chapter – at
least. You don’t have to make them relevant, just hot as hell. If you can
include food in some way, that’s a huge bonus. I’m not talking steak and chips
here, obviously, but whipped cream, melted chocolate, maple syrup-ymmv. If they
go to sleep after sex, then write about the sex in the morning—of course it has
to be just as good – and whatever you do don’t go mentioning any REAL morning
fragrances. Your readers get enough of THAT in real life.
c.
As with no fragrances, there
must be no hair. Hair belongs on HEADS. And PERHAPS a small sprinkling under
the armpits (which of course differentiates them from women—except European
women, because... yanno...) and the armpit must is sexy, musky, manly, full of
character like a fine wine. It doesn’t reek of sweat. Ever. No man in m/m has a
hairy chest—they are allowed one or two hairs which will be a subject of much
teasing and dialogue (see above) especially when in bed—but no more than that.
A “treasure trail is also allowed, (in fact mandatory because otherwise one
would think the characters were underage) and some (and i mean some e.g. light) stubble is allowed by
only for morning sex.
i.
No hair shall be mentioned in any of the
following places:
1.
The back
2.
The legs
3.
The balls
4.
The ears
5.
The nose
6.
The arms
7.
The toes (what are they,
Hobbits?)
8.
The arse crack – i mean yeuch!
d.
End the book with a sex scene.
That’s vital.
7.
Don’t hurt your darlings too
much. There’s only too much conflict your reader is going to stand, and that’s
not much, to be honest. Conflict such as a nice war—as long as it’s going on
around them and they aren’t in actual danger, ditto for a natural disaster such
as a volcano or an avalanche. Being swept away by said avalanche and breaking
both legs: not sexy. Getting stranded with the sexiest man alive until you are
dug out (and you both have lots of food, specially the aforementioned chocolate
and squirty cream) is sexy.
8.
Another note on dub-con, no
matter how your omega complains and says he doesn’t want it, eventually it WILL
lead to love. This is natural progression and cannot be changed.
Well, that’s about it. Stick to those rules
and you’ll find that yes! You, as a women CAN write m/m and your readers will
thank you for it.
**Note always use the term dub-con, readers
don’t like rape but they’ll suck up dub-con with a straw and beg for more.
Erastes
